Change

Things have definately changed in the past few weeks for me.  Change can be a good thing for us overall, but sometimes we are afraid of the change or maybe it's just so new and different to us that we feel uncomfortable with a situation.  In the past month I have:

-packed up and moved 3.5 hours away from home
-unpacked all of that stuff and tried to fit it in an apartment
-started being responsible for cooking supper (not so good at it yet)
-started a new school where I will be for 12 hours each weekday
-worked on realizing that I live with another person now and I can't always have the room at 78 degrees (work in progress)
-spent hundreds of dollars on books and veterinary supplies for labs
-learned how to shop for and buy car and renters insurance
-tried to decipher health insurance forms

Honestly, it's overwhelming.  So many new things to learn so fast.  How do you cope?

Here's where the kid in me comes out.

I go back to things that I remember and love doing years ago.  I watched Tarzan and Cinderella (2 awesome movies).  I looked through pictures on my computer from high school (no, not high school itself ick) And I bought a computer game that I used to play when I was a kid: Jumpstart 4th grade (on the haunted island).  Apprently Matthew had this game too and we are both raving about it.  "My favorite game was the math one where you are a frog and you eat bug numbers coming out of the well."  Haha-and neither of us ever beat the game so guess what we are doing this weekend? Not cleaning the kitchen or bathroom:)

Storm

the windshield wipers are a handkerchief for the cloud-laden horizon-
desperately they hide the evidence of the sky’s distress.
but the tears of distress are making things new wiping away the blush and powder of purple-chalked sidewalks and forgotten dusty roads-
causing an unfolding of warm and cool colors.

Update

Hey bloggers,

Thanks for the prayers for the past 2 days. :)  I'm back home and have internet!! Such a good feeling.


Surgery went quite well and suprisingly it doesn't hurt.  The only thing that does hurt is the tooth that has been hurting for the past month, but hopefully getting to a jaw specialist next week will help that too.  Tis the season for healing.


I was talking to my mom tonight about watching TV and she was talking about the shows we watched last night.  I was like "We watched TV?"  and then I got to thinking "When did we get to grandmas?"  "How did I get out of the car?"  "When did Matthew leave?"  Apprently that sedative worked pretty darn well AFTER the surgery was over cause I was awake for the whole thing but after getting in the car to go home, I have no idea what happened and all I remember is grandma turning out the lights for bed.  Can I have some of that medicine just to keep on hand in case I can't sleep? haha  Today, Mom was mimicking the expression I had on my face last night and I'm like "O my gosh did I really look like that?"  It's fun to laugh together over situations like that.


The Waltons used to be a show that my parents would often watch.  I think I watched like 5 hours of it today.  I still don't know all their names but that redhead girl is so nice.

Right now, I live in this verse:

Matthew 6:34  “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

Unexpected Surgery

Sometimes you just never know what your day has in store for you.

Yesterday, my mom and I went into lincoln because I had a periodontist appointment.  Basically a periodontist is a dentist who specializes in gums and gum disease.  I went because gum disease runs in the family and was starting to have a few syptoms of it and I wanted to take preventative measures.  Also, I wanted to ask about the pain in my one tooth.

Well compared and tested the nerve and looked at the root line and said everything was fine. But when I opened my jaw, she said it felt like a ratchet and if I didn't see a jaw specialist, I would have more cartiliege damage and arthritis in it for sure.  Ok.

She tested all the gum pockets with a little probe thing and started talking to the other lady about stuff when suddenly I heard the word "graft."  I think my heart skipped a beat.  Was she serious?  Well here's the dealio.

According to her, I was born with very thin gums on the bottom.  And when I had braces, it pushed the roots even further ahead.  So there is no protective tissue left.  Meaning that if I say, cut my gums on a potato chip, my tooth root would be exposed and the healing would be very difficult.  So what happens is they harvest tissue fromt the room of my mouth and sew it on to my 6 bottom teeth to create another layer of tissue.  I've been ordered to live off of applesauce, macaroni, mashed potatoes, and ice cream for the next 2 weeks which I guess is ok with me cause I love macaroni and cheese.

Honestly, I'm scared.  My mom had this done 6 years ago and she was in bed for a while.  I'm afraid that maybe it will make me look different especially while it is healing ( you have to wear a guard and guaze for a while).  But at the same time I'm glad its happening now.  Technically they should have done this years ago and I'm not sure how the dentist missed it because the perio said this surgery was not optional and insurance company WOULD hear of it.  I will have enough time to heal before the wedding and I wont have to worry about getting this done after July and possibly not having insurance to pay for it!  Mom and Matthew are coming with me today though which will be great especially since they are having me take those sedative pills (which say you can't drive for 24 hours haha).


So I went in hoping to take some proactiv measure and ended up scheduling a $1700 surgery for the day after.  It's amazing how God works through things.  If I had gotten a job this summer, I wouldn't have had the 2 weeks off to recover and since this is a necessary procedure for my future health, I'm all for it.


To lighten the mood a bit, mom and I went shopping afterwards.  She bought me a strawberry ceramic picther and a lemon ceramic bowl as a graduation present which will look lovely in the apartment.  She tried on dresses for the wedding but still no luck.  Then she asked if I needed anything from Barnes and Noble...."I don't NEED anything, but"  OK lets go.  I came out with a book called Breakfast Heaven which has some awesome recipes for me to try.

I'm getting back RSVP's for the wedding!  Such a great feeling to know that some of these people will share the big day with us.  I hope they like the food and decorations...especially the decorations at the reception.  They have no idea.....

Struggle

Well tomorrow I visit the periodontist for a regular exam and also to try and figure out what is causing so much pain on the left side.  I haven't experienced childbirth, but I feel its comparable and after 4 weeks of this I'm ready for relief.  It's hard to do anything else but concentrate on the hurt - I would sit and watch TV and sleep all day if I could but alas we have no TV here...



Grandma brought over a crockpot of soup.  I took it down the stairs and opened the plastic lid that contained the reddish liquid of vegetable soup.  The smell filled my body and immediately brought back thoughts of my childhood - of having hot soup in winter time and wondering why there was never any cheese in vegetable soup.




Once again I walked out of Walmart with things I didn't intend to buy originally.  Peaches in a can?  An OFF! candle?  A "plant your own sunflower" kit?  And green teabags (which is really gross to drink but great for temporary toothache relief).  I think I will look for that flowerpot and plant the sunflower.  It says you have to transplant it when it gets 2 feet tall and I'm like "Why?  I wanted an indoor plant?"  But I wanted something to nurture and watch it grow as it sits in the sun of the window.



I mailed 150 wedding invitations today and I and SOOO GLAD I never have to see those things again.  I'm sure Matthew is saying the same thing.